When yogurt goes off, what does it look like?

I may have eaten some Greek Yogurt that had gone off. When I peeled back the foil, the yogurt looked aerated. And when my spoon dipped into the center, there was a slight crackling sound, as though fermentation had happened. Not being overly experienced with Greek yogurt, my initial brilliant thought was "This is different!"

In the movie land of my mind, this is where the audience shouts at the movie screen, "Stupid girl, different kills! Run! Run! Go throw up or something! Botulism is going to KILL YOU!" Fade to black.

We have experienced some very hot temperatures in Berkeley which has caused the shortbread I made on Friday to blossom into a delicious buttery crumb. I was skeptic when the recipe said it gets better with age because age usually brings mold, fermentation and the effects of gravity. Only the first two have shown to improve the taste of food and drink. The last one is a sign to start investing in strong elastic straps. Everything succumbs to the force field of gravity.

In the past, I start wearing a uniform during finals week. There is a micro-fiber knit top that I like to wear because it keeps me warm and it is really soft. But I haven't done that this semester. The finals uniform is a superstitious tradition similar to athletes who always put on their gloves and cup in a certain order. I doubt there is a direct causal connection between the knit top and my performance on the final exam. Maybe it cuddles me during the long hours of study, misleading me into thinking that I am in a safe, warm place. Mostly, it keeps me dry (it's a yoga top) because studying for exams causes people to sweat in unreasonable places with comically-strong odors. For proof, please refer to the school's library. The study room gets a bit rank and I think I've seen the glass windows fog up a little from the moisture. I would say it's like that scene in Titanic where Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet have an intimate moment in a vintage motorcar and he leaves a handprint on the fogged up rear window. Except the school is neither vintage, cool nor capable of intimate moments. No one is going to make a movie about studying for final exams without an extreme montage sequence, several montage sequences. And death will not save me from student loan forgiveness by dragging me into the cold North Atlantic. So really it's not like that movie at all. This is my sad, lonely, isolated personal hell, that I share with about 10,000 other bar takers this summer. Bring your sunscreen!